an anoymous author
was the night before Christmas - Old Santa was pissed
cussed out the elves and threw down his list
Miserable little brats, ungrateful little jerks
I have good mind to scrap the whole works.
busted my ass for damn near a year.
Instead of ĄThanks Santaď - what do I hear?
The old lady bitches cause I work late at night
The elves want more money - The reindeer all fight.
got drunk and goosed all the maids
Donner is pregnant and Vixen has AIDS.
And just when I thought that things would get better.
assholes from IRS sent me a letter.
say I owe taxes - if that ainít damn funny.
Who the hell ever sent Santa Claus any money?
And the kids these days - they are all the pits
want the impossible...Those mean little shits.
spent a whole year making wagons and sleds
Assembling dolls...Their arms, legs and heads
I made a ton of yo yoís - No request for them
They want computers and robots... they think Iím IBM!
you think thatís bad...just picture this
Try holding those brats...with their pants full of piss
pull on my nose - they grab at my beard
And if I donít smile...parents think Iím weird.
through the air...dodging the trees
Falling down chimneys and skinning my knees
Iím quitting this job...thereís just no employment.
Iíll sit on my fat ass and draw unemployment.
no Christmas this year...now you know the reason.
I found me a blonde...Iím going SOUTH for the season!!
was sent to me from my dear friend Jeanne. Thank you,